Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Dirk and Cuban: The Text Messages

In the wake of the Dallas Mavericks' six-game emasculation last week at the hands of the Golden State Warriors, people wondered how Mark Cuban and Dirk Nowitzki would react to the upset.

The Pretzel Factory came across a series of text messages between the owner and the MVP candidate that took place some time this past weekend. Enjoy.

MC: wassup big man?

DW: nuthin

how u holding up?

eh. im watchng drunk hasselhoff on utube

oh man that shits hilarious haha!!! ur boy looks all kinds of pathetic

hes not my boy ok! i h8 him i h8 him i h8 him. i h8 hoops. i h8 evrybdy

dirk don't say that. u wanna come over & ride atv's thru my house?

no im just gonna eat 12 tubs of americone dream n go 2 bed

hey i can't even get that ice cream. is it good? but srsly dirk lets go get sum drinks & pick up sum hooters waitresses

nah. i got no game. i sit @ tables against the wall & wait 4 grls 2 talk 2 me but they never does

lol u got game dirk! ur a big goodlkng guy & u make assloads of $$$ & women like that

i guess

u just gotta get in there man throw caution to the wind

but what if i get rejected?

then u pick urself up dust urself off get mad & get back in there n fight for what u want

i want 2 b the man mark

good. i'll swing by and pick u up in 30 mins ok?

ok. can we go somewhere dark? i dont want ne1 2 recgnze me

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dammit dirk. ok. anything u want

& somwhere w/ a lot of tall ppl b c i dont want them pointing & laffing @ me either

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maybe we should wait & go to gm 3 of the suns-spurs series in san antonio & u could study amare stoudemire & tim duncan

lol y would i want to do that? im a waaaay better shooter than those guys

dirk do u wanna get laid tonite?

umm yeah i guess that wld be kinda fun

ok just sit still i'm gonna send you a hooker

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Incisive, and accurate

Rickey Henderson said...

Frankly, I find this to be both shallow and pedantic.

Anonymous said...

lame. very lame

Shorty said...

hysterical